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Marriage
Holy Rosary prepares approximately 30 couples for marriage per year. One of the most important parts of the marriage preparation process is the workshop we ask couples to participate in. Couples have two options:
If you are an engaged couple who would like to be married at Holy Rosary, please contact Sherry at 937-1488, ext. 210 at least six months in advance.
Requirements The Archdiocese of Seattle requires all couples preparing for a Catholic marriage to participate in a marriage preparation program. At Holy Rosary, your preparation consists of a series of meetings with the Pastor and PA for Marriage, as well as attending a marriage preparation workshop. Your initial meeting will be with the Pastor. After that you will meet with the PA for Marriage to complete the necessary paperwork. As part of marriage preparation, the following documents will need to be provided by each couple:
Certificate of Baptism A recently issued certificate of baptism is required for all Catholics. If possible, please bring any baptismal information you have to your first marriage preparation session with the PA for Marriage. At a minimum, this includes the name of the parish and city where you were baptized. Non-Catholic Christians who are baptized are asked to obtain a letter or certificate from the church where they were baptized. Please arrange to have these mailed directly to Holy Rosary (4136 42nd Ave SW, Seattle, WA 98116).
Declaration of Freedom to Marry (for previous marriages of either party) Any previous marriage may require the completion of appropriate forms or a Declaration of Nullity (church annulment). Please advise the priest or deacon immediately of any previous marriages by either party, regardless of where or when they were celebrated. Holy Rosary is forbidden to set a wedding date before any annulment proceeding is completed.
Marriage License Requirements:
*Both parties must be 18 years
or older Washington State law requires a 3-day waiting period before the marriage license becomes valid. This means that you must wait at least three full days after the application is filed before the marriage ceremony can be performed. The license is valid for only 60 days. The marriage ceremony must be performed before the 60-day expiration of the license. Please plan to turn in your marriage license to the PA for Marriage two weeks prior to your ceremony. Applications in Person: Both bride and groom must be present, pay the $64 fee (cash only at downtown Seattle; cash or checks at other sites; no debit or credit cards), and complete the application. The license will be issued at that time but does not become valid until a three-day waiting period has expired. Applications by Mail: Applications by mail are processed at the downtown Seattle office only. Send completed and notarized application along with money order or cashier's check made payable to King County Marriage Licenses. The license will not be mailed; it will need to be picked up from the downtown Seattle office. Receive a copy of the application form via fax by calling (206) 296-3933 ext. 21, or download from the King County Website: www.kingcounty.gov/courts/marriage. For general questions regarding marriage licensing call (206) 296-4021. Please turn in the license to the Parish Office two weeks prior to the wedding.
Marriage Preparation Workshops The Engaged Encounter Weekend, extending from Friday evening to Sunday afternoon, is held at a local retreat house. Because it is a full weekend program, it affords greater opportunity for sharing, reflection, and gathering a view of married life that can extend beyond the wedding day. You should plan to attend an Engaged Encounter weekend soon after you have had your first meeting with the Pastor. Reserve your weekend early as they fill up quickly! Visit www.ceeseattle.org for dates and to register. The Office for Youth and Young Adult Ministry offers two Marriage Preparation Retreats per year; one for winter and one for spring. The 2010 Winter Retreat will be Feb. 5-7 and the 2010 Spring Retreat will be May 21-23. Both retreats will offer couples preparing for the Sacrament of Marriage the opportunity to reflect on the strengths and challenges of their relationship. Contact oyyamretreats@seattlearch.org to register.
Couples Who Live Out Of Town With the permission of the Pastor of Holy Rosary, a couple who currently lives out of town can arrange to complete their marriage preparation at a Catholic parish near them. The couple still needs to meet once with the Pastor of Holy Rosary, preferably as soon as possible after setting the marriage date. The couple should have the parish handling their marriage preparation send a letter to Holy Rosary that confirms their preparation arrangements. This letter is due one month after setting the date to confirm the wedding. When the marriage preparation is complete, the marriage file will be sent to Holy Rosary.
Wedding Times Weddings are held on Friday evenings and Saturdays afternoons. The church will be unlocked two hours prior to your ceremony to allow time to dress, take photos and seat your guests. There will be no time for photos in the church following the ceremony; however, you may use the front lawn for as long as you wish. All weddings begin on time.
Rehearsal Times The Rehearsal is usually the night before the wedding ceremony and will be facilitated by one of the Parish Wedding Coordinators. She will begin promptly at the scheduled time, whether or not all are present.
Visiting Priest or Deacon With the explicit permission (“delegation”) of the pastor of Holy Rosary, a visiting priest or deacon may officiate at your wedding. Please discuss this with the pastor when you meet with him. It is your responsibility to contact the priest or deacon to ask him to officiate. If the priest or deacon is from outside the Archdiocese of Seattle, he must submit a Guest Priest Testimonial that testifies to his good standing.
The Sacrament of Reconciliation It is strongly recommended that Catholics preparing for marriage celebrate the Sacrament of Reconciliation some proximate time prior to the wedding so that they may fruitfully receive the sacrament of marriage. The Pastor can help answer questions in this regard.
Church Decorations
Our church worship area is decorated appropriate to the liturgical season. These items may not be changed for sacramental celebrations, including weddings. These items include, but are not limited to flower arrangements, wall hangings, altar cloths, etc. Wedding decorations should not impede the approach to or the encircling of the altar, or any of the ritual movement and action. Nothing is to be taped or otherwise attached to the pews or floor in a manner that will damage them. All paraphernalia must be removed immediately following the wedding, but you may leave the flowers if you wish. Please designate two or more responsible friends or relatives to be your “setup” and “clean up” crew. They need to check in with the wedding coordinator for specific directions at your wedding rehearsal. No fresh or dried flower petals may be scattered. Silk petals may be used, if arrangements are made for ALL PETALS to be picked up immediately following the ceremony by your own cleanup crew. All floral arrangements should be prepared by your florist before being brought to the church. If this is not possible, specific arrangements must be made in advance with the PA for Marriage. Any last-minute floral work must be done in the floral workroom; however, this space is very limited. If this room is used, please make sure it is put back in good order. The Worship Space and surrounding rooms and area must be left in the condition in which found. Any supplies brought in by a florist must be removed immediately by your cleanup crew following the ceremony. Any boxes used to carry flowers are to be removed from the church before the ceremony begins. Candelabra may be used anywhere in the church sanctuary or along the main aisle. Candelabra used on the main aisle must have the flame enclosed by glass protection. Holy Rosary does not have candelabra for loan; they must be supplied by the couple and be free standing. Because the aisle is not carpeted, we do not allow aisle runners for safety reasons.
Dressing Rooms The downstairs restroom area will be reserved for the women of the wedding party. It is recommended that the men in the wedding party arrive at the church already in their wedding attire. The Wedding Coordinator will show you the appropriate areas at your rehearsal.
Photography
We understand the importance of preserving the memory of your wedding day through photographs and video. However, the clicks and flashes of cameras and roving video recorders easily detract from the sacredness of the liturgy. Please adhere to the following guidelines:
Please inform your friends and families of these guidelines. If you are using a worship aid (“program”) you may wish to incorporate the following phrase in it: “Kindly refrain from taking pictures or video recording during the ceremony.”
Throwing Rice Your family and friends will want to celebrate with you as you leave the church, and at the reception. The throwing of rice, confetti, birdseed, flower petals, or anything else as part of the festivities is not permitted. Not only is it difficult to clean up; it is also a hazard. However, you may use special wedding bubbles in place of the rice/seed/confetti. (Conventional bubbles can stain cement, bricks and clothing.) Please be sure that your designated cleanup crew picks up any bottles left behind—check both inside and outside of the church.
The School Hall and Lanigan Center are available for wedding receptions at an additional cost. For the average wedding reception of 100-200 people, the School Hall is satisfactory; whereas for more than 200 guests, Lanigan Center would be more appropriate. You are welcome to use our facilities as long as you use our reception committee. For costs and information, please call the Wedding Reception Coordinator, at 937-1488, extension 200.
Guest Registers & Receiving Lines Guest Registers may not be placed in the church. Since many guests come at the same time, this creates a traffic jam, interferes with the work of the ushers and delays the timely start of the wedding. We ask that you have it available later at your reception. If you would like to include a Receiving Line, you may do so outside on the east lawn.
Alcohol Alcohol is not allowed on church property. It is inappropriate for members of the wedding party to consume alcohol (or any other mind-altering substance) before the rehearsal or before the wedding. It is especially important that the bride and groom refrain from drinking before their wedding as it could affect the validity of the marriage itself and could possibly mean the cancellation of the wedding. Please reserve this for the reception if you intend the serving of alcohol to be a part of your hospitality.
Wedding Coordinator One of our Holy Rosary Parish Wedding Coordinators will be present to conduct your rehearsal and will facilitate the ceremony on your wedding day (even with a guest priest) and is always available to help solve any problems you may encounter. She will unlock the church and help with the set-up, ensuring your wedding starts on time. The Parish Wedding Coordinator will help make your wedding as special and individual as possible. Photographers, videographers, bridal consultants, and similar persons need to confer with the Parish Wedding Coordinator regarding all plans.
Worship Aid (Program) A printed worship aid, when properly prepared, encourages the active participation in the spoken and sung prayers of the service and helps those who are unfamiliar with the Catholic Liturgy to understand its basic structure. A worship aid also provides a thoughtful remembrance of the occasion. If you wish, a worship aid that you can copy for your wedding guests will be provided.
Printed Invitations The address for Holy Rosary Parish given in the phone book (4139 42nd Ave. SW) causes confusion, as this is the location of the Parish Office. To help your guests locate the Church, it would be better if your invitations read: “4210 SW Genesee St.” or “SW Genesee St. and 42nd Ave. SW.” A map is available with directions to the Church that you may copy and include with your invitations. Please note that 42nd Ave. SW is ONE WAY NORTHBOUND between Genesee and Dakota streets. You may inform your guests that parking is available in the lot just North of the School building. It is accessed from Dakota St or at the entrance to the alley on 42nd Ave SW.
Children in the Wedding
A Ring Bearer or Flower Girl is not required. When they are involved as part of the wedding party, they should not be less than 5 years old, as children of this age tend to panic when they see a church full of people and anticipate a long walk down the center aisle. Please consider carefully whether their presence will add or detract from the joyful solemnity of the liturgy.
Attire of the Wedding Party When choosing your Wedding Gown and your Attendants’ dresses, please keep in mind that the Sanctuary is a holy and sacred place. We hope you will observe some sense of modesty (i.e., no low cut or back-less bodices or very short hems).
The Procession
One noticeable change in weddings in recent years is the introduction of the liturgical procession. Every wedding at Holy Rosary begins with a full liturgical procession, usually led by the cross, followed by the entire wedding party. We strongly encourage the participation of all parents: the bride and groom enter with both of their parents, or family representatives, as part of this procession--a departure from the old practice of having the bride "given away" by her father, which dates back to feudal times when the bride was regarded as property in a financial contract. Our practice recognizes the role of both parents and the importance of both families coming together to celebrate. An example of the procession might be:
Cross
The Wedding Liturgy Approximately one to two months prior to your ceremony you will meet with the PA for Marriage to plan the details of your ceremony using the planning booklet given to you at your first meeting. The Wedding Liturgy is modeled on the Sunday Liturgy of the Parish, with the addition of the Rite of Marriage and Processional Music. Following is an outline of the Liturgy:
INTRODUCTORY RITES
Gathering of
Assembly LITURGY OF THE WORD
First Reading –
read by a friend or family member RITE OF MARRIAGE
Exchange of
Consent, Vows, Rings
LITURGY OF THE
EUCHARIST
Preparation of
Table and Gifts
CLOSING
Lectors In selecting someone to do the scripture readings, please keep in mind that the person who fills this liturgical role will be proclaiming the Word of God. These individuals should be instructed at the rehearsal on the appropriate timing and method to proclaiming the scriptures. It is most important that they be able to read so that the assembly can hear the Word of God. Copies of the readings will be provided by the wedding coordinator and placed on the ambo (pulpit) prior to the liturgy. There is no need for the readers to carry a copy of the reading to the ambo.
Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion If your wedding will include the celebration of the Eucharist, there may be a need for extraordinary ministers to help with the distribution of Holy Communion. Family or friends who function as extraordinary ministers in their own parishes may fill this role during the wedding. Please discuss this matter with the PA for Marriage when planning the liturgy.
Should there be a Mass? There are two liturgical options for celebrating the marriage: the Rite of Marriage within Mass, and the Rite of Marriage without Mass. For marriage between two Catholics, the Church recommends that the rite of marriage take place within the celebration of the Eucharist. If, however, the couple has been inactive in practicing the faith, rarely attends the Sunday Eucharist, or is cohabiting, it is recommended that the rite of marriage take place outside of Mass. If there are questions about this please feel free to discuss them with the priest who will be presiding at your ceremony. For marriage between a Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic, or non baptized person, the rite of marriage will be celebrated outside Mass.
Unity Candle The unity candle is not an official part of the Catholic marriage ritual. Its use is strictly optional. It is the responsibility of the couple to provide the unity candle and the two small accompanying candles and any holders. The unity candle may not be placed on the altar. The parish provides a separate wood stand for this purpose. This arrangement may be taken with you for the Bride’s Table at the reception.
Music Matrimony is a sacrament celebrated within a wedding liturgy. Because weddings are a part of the liturgical prayer of the whole Church and not merely a private ceremony of the couple and families, music must be selected for weddings using the same criteria as for any other liturgy. Sometimes the only music familiar to the couple is a song heard at a friend’s ceremony and one not necessarily suitable to the sacrament. Decisions about choice and placement of wedding music grow out of the three judgments proposed in the Bishop’s Committee on the Liturgy Music in Catholic Worship.
Please contact the Parish Organist at least two months before your wedding to discuss your music options. At that time you will discuss parish music guidelines and what music possibilities are available in our parish. Our parish Organist/Pianist has first right of refusal for all weddings. Other arrangements need to be coordinated through the Marriage Office. The fee for the organist/pianist is explained in the Parish Organist’s ‘Letter to the Engaged Couple’, included in booklet. The proper wedding music enhances the marriage ceremony. Wedding music, which is chosen as a reflection of the couple’s love for each other, must also be chosen with the intent of helping the couple and the wedding guests pray well. Whatever music is used must be understood and recognized as worship of God. Enclosed in this packet is a music-planning sheet with suggested songs and hymns for each part of your Wedding Liturgy. Also included is a CD set with samples of these songs and hymns. Certain traditional organ selections such as the “Bridal Chorus” from Wagner’s “Lohengrin” (occasionally referred to as “Here Comes the Bride”) and the “Wedding March” from Medndelssohn’s “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” are popular for weddings in the United States, mostly because of the opera and movies. Both were composed as part of larger dramatic works. The music of “Lohengrin” accompanies an illicit ceremony, a tragic bedroom fiasco. Mendelssohn’s incidental music to Shakespeare’s “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” accompanies a farcical wedding. There are much better choices for processional music. You might consider Purcell’s “Trumpet Voluntary” or “Trumpet Tune.” Our Organist will be happy to make other suggestions and play them for you. Whatever the style or combination of instruments, the music at weddings should be planned with as much care as any other wedding detail. Holy Rosary is blessed to have many accomplished and experienced musicians who can assist you in choosing the music for your wedding liturgy. Couples are required to use our parish musicians because of their familiarity with the traditions and acoustics of Holy Rosary Church. The Parish Organist will assist you in choosing a Cantor for your wedding. However, you may have an appropriate song sung by your own soloist at some point in the Liturgy. It is not necessary for the parish musicians to attend the wedding rehearsals. PLEASE NOTE: recorded music is not permitted at Holy Rosary.
All fees are due two weeks prior to the ceremony. The wedding fee helps to defray costs of the following:
FOCCUS Inventory In-Parish fee: $385 The parishioner rate for weddings is set in order to honor the commitment of participating, contributing members of this community. It is unfair to them to extend it to people who simply change parish affiliations in order to pay a lower fee. Normally speaking, the parishioner rate applies to those who have been registered and participating members for at least six months prior to scheduling. No parishioner of Holy Rosary is ever turned away because of an inability to pay the fee. Out-of-Parish fee: $850 Out of parish couples must obtain the permission of their present pastor and complete all marriage preparation at their home parish. This must be established in a letter from the home parish pastor to confirm the wedding date. The letter is due one month after setting the date…if it is not received by then, the date is removed from our schedule. Additional Fees: The fee for organist/pianist is usually $150-200, depending on whether a Mass or ceremony; the music selections, other musicians involved. Please see the letter written by our Parish Organist for more information. The fee for cantor is $125-150, depending on whether there is a Mass or ceremony; number of sung pieces, etc. Life After The Wedding As you begin your life together, it is very important that you become members of a parish. If you intend to live within the boundaries of Holy Rosary, you should now register as a family. Please request a new parishioner packet from the Parish Office Front Desk. If you move into another parish, it is very important that you register in that parish as soon as possible.
Pastoral Assistant for Marriage:
Parish Organist:
Wedding Coordinators:
Wedding Reception Coordinator:
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